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I THREW THE BOY OUT FOR DRINKING AND I FEEL GUILTY

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Contributed by: Bob Kuebler YWAP on 3/14/2008

This message is brought to you by
YWAP - Youth With A Purpose.

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I THREW THE BOY OUT FOR DRINKING & I FEEL GUILTY
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My heart breaks for the young people that I have to throw out of our YWAP After School Program at Holy Cross. We have very clear rules here:

* No cursing, trash talking, bullying, teasing or negative comments of any kind. As you walk into our Youth Center you will see a sign that says:

Positive words only, are spoken,
negative words make people feel broken.

*No fighting, no threats of fighting and no play fighting.
*No smoking (within 100 feet of the building), no drugs and no alcohol.
*No one under the influence of drugs or alcohol will be allowed on the property.
*No touchy, no feely - no personal displays of affection although you are allowed a hug for a 2-count (2 seconds. We do believe in hugs!)

The penalties for breaking these rules are also clear:

*Immediate removal and a 1 day suspension for verbal infractions and a 1 week suspension for fighting, drugs or alcohol. We do grant many forms of grace and require acts of neighborliness depending on the severity of the infraction.

Many years ago I served for 10 years as a Trustee for the Iroquois Central School Board of Education. I remember having a discussion with the Superintendent. I disagreed with the school suspension policy of suspending students from attending school. The Superintendent said that kids really wanted to be in school with their fiends and that time spent outside of school would make them want to come back. He was right, but I still disagreed. I felt that with most parents working, the youth would be left alone, unsupervised with too much idle time. Maybe an in school suspension with mandatory attendance at a behavioral/motivational program would be more beneficial. Iroquois was a suburban school with a different culture than most urban schools.Thanks in large part to Dr. Glover's efforts, Iroquois had more resources for more positive programs for youth. Dr. Mike Glover is currently the District Superintendent of the Genesee Valley BOCES as well as the the Interim District Superintendent for Monroe #1 BOCES.

I think Mike Glover was the greatest thing ever to happen to Iroquois.

I learned a great deal during my time at Iroquois but I am struggling to apply the compassion that I learned there to the lives of young people who live in an area described as "World War III."

So what about the boy I threw out for drinking?

He has no where to go but the street.
His mom works,
Dad is not around.
He lives in a neighborhood where they shoot people.
He is very smart but does not do well in school.
Over a year ago he was attending our Entrepreneurial Incubator Program. (We do not have the people or resources right now to continue that program.)

On Wednesday I threw him out.
On Thursday he came back and apologized. He does have character.
On the sidewalk outside the Youth Center, we had a long discussion. We talked about alcohol and his future. I told him that God had a plan for his life but he had to walk out that plan. I said that he could not come back for a week.

I watched his slouched figure walk down the street in dejection.
My slouched figure walked into the Youth Center in dejection.

How do you help kids who don't know what love is. How do you help them to understand what hope and opportunity is? Many youth today are happy to be suspended. They don't have to take tests, study or put up with gang threats in school.
The schools do not have the staff or resources to deal with these kids so they throw them out like "yesterday's news."

How often do you hear a politician talk about programs for young people? Kids don't vote. They talk about abortion rights, the right to sell pornography, the right to give out condoms by the millions. They spend millions trying to figure out if a professional ballplayer used illegal drugs. What about the rights of young people?
Why are we short on teachers?
Why are we short on guidance counselors?
Why are we short on after school programs?
Why do we spend 95% of the Erie County, N.Y.youth budget on intervention and only 5% on prevention?

Our youth are 100% of the future. Imagine if we spent more money on entrepreneurial programs involving youth. You would turn our decaying cities around in a heart beat.

YWAPBuffalo
YOUTH WITH A PURPOSE
ALL CHILDREN ARE GIFTED
345 7th Street
Buffalo, New York 14201
716-830-8240
ywapbuffalo@yahoo.com
Check out our blogs at: http://buffalo.yourhub.com/~YWAP
Our long term goal is to start a 24-7 positive radio station for youth in Buffalo, NY that reaches the world.
We also have a conflict resolution assembly program for schools.

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Submitted By: Debb Fucina

posted on 3/15/2008 @ 3:36:35 PM

Rated Story

Bob ~ I can only imagine how terrible you felt. You will make that young man more responsible by enforcing the rules. I'm sure he knows what love is now. Your love of the children you touch every single day is reflected by all those kids returning each day to your center. As tough as it is to turn someone away from the only thing they know as "safe", you did the right thing and that young man will have more love and respect for you and himself. (I'm sorry I couldn't chat with you yesterday when you stopped by the office. I was in meetings all afternoon.) Keep up the good work Bob. You are a God-send to those kids. Thank you for all you do. God Bless You. "Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go."

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