I keep a movie on my laptop every night as I fall asleep- it's the only thing that lulls me to sleep quickly but it has to be a movie I've seen a few times or else I'll want to stay up watching it, which negates the point. I watched episodes of 'Wonderfalls' for a while, then 'LOST' (not the best choice because I always want to watch it so I would put it on commentary) and then 'Alice in Wonderland' and 'Elizabethtown' and then I got really jonesing to see 'Lost In Translation', one of my top favorites. Yesterday I finally saw the whole thing through again and that damn movie and ending gets me everytime- I LOVE IT. It's just got the best atmosphere and ambiance and feeling and humor and poignancy and melancholy and although I never was really into seeing Asia, the movie makes me want to go to Tokyo every time I see it. I love Bill Murray in it and Scarlett Johansson too although I was never as into her again as I was with her in this- they just make such a perfect pair. And the end just kills me both in a happy and sad way- there's someone on YouTube that digitally processed what he said to her at the end and its "I have to be leaving but I won't let that come between us, ok?" I LOVE IT. It doesn't mean that they're committing adultery (and maybe they'd get divorced and be with each other b/c the movie definitely shows that neither of their marriages are with the right person) but their cool friendship isn't going to be broken....and I love listening to interviews with Sofia Coppola- she just has the most calming voice and we love the same kind of music and movies and design and she's defintely someone I'd like to work with- maybe I'll be able to someday! When you're done watching LIT you just feel you know a lot about her as well as the characters in the movie. And if anyone know where to find those cherry blossom ceiling and wall hangers that Scarlett put up in her hotel room in the movie, PLEASE let me know as I'd love to get some for my house.

Other things going on-

I actually had two really fun days in the past week or so, more fun than I've had since getting here and actually felt connected in some way to people or a place or even myself since I've felt really disconnected since being here. Last weekend Danica (who I met at a food party, random enough) went with me to my friend James' workshop at LA826 where we worked with kids to write down their dreams and then we acted them out. After that we went shopping for desserts (and through Culver City which I hadn't seen before and I got to check out the simply massive Sony Studios) and groceries and drove to El Segundo to her friend Marjorie's bungalow (really cool and art deco) and we made food- artichoke dip with crackers infused with herbs and stuff mushrooms and huge gourmet type sandwiches and made cosmopolitans and lemon drops and watched episodes of 'Sex and The City' because of the movie coming out. Sort of ironically I was reading all of Marjorie's wedding magazines which is an interesting juxtaposition to the show but that's not because I'm getting married, that's just because I love party and wedding and design details and she let me tear out whatever I liked. It was just a great night- meeting a new friend and connecting with the two of them. Since living here I'm realizing that you can do as many 'fun activities' or 'parties' or 'hanging out' as you want but if it's not with people you really connect to, there's no point at all and it can just make you feel more isolated and lonely than if you were sitting watching a movie by yourself. SoI felt lucky to hang out with those two.

Last night my friend Missy invited me to Russell's b-day party who is a fantastic LA photographer. I took a lot of photos of his yard for ideas for my own themed b day party when I get back home in two weeks because I have to start working on that. The Mexican food was great, the margueritas were as well although I'm not a big drinkers, and the cake which was shaped like a camera was utterly fantastic. I really liked the ambiance and the decor and how the seating was spread out all over the backyard and it had little nooks and a really cool Narnia-type door near his photo studio!

So I'm glad I've had some fun before going home- I fly out in 12 days! I'm so excited to get back to Buffalo. Even when I have a good time here I still feel sort of alone and strange and disconnected and I hope that goes away because it's hard to feel that way all the time- it's just so lonely and makes me feel like I'm drowning. So I work on the new book a lot and my other writing projects and network (some good news coming up with that) and hope to be working in creative fields and that should make me feel more connected, but I'll always love going home.